January 2004 Archives

January 31, 2004

Polygamy Crackdown

United States: Authorities have got themselves in a tizz over crackdown on polygamy, favoured by the odd isolated fundie Mormon sect. They seem unsure how to even go about it.

The most sensational of the recent incidents has come in the small, tight-lipped community of Colorado City, Ariz. Recently, a power struggle has emerged within the polygamy-oriented sect that dominates the town. Some men have been excommunicated and their wives and children been reassigned to other men...

January 30, 2004

The Ticking Fundie Time Bomb

Iraq: Being badgered by a particular loony fundie whilst at Uni gave Rene Gonzalez a distaste for their kind, especially their dodgy convert the heathens mantra being disguised as humanitarian aid.

It is not a morally right policy. It is racist, arrogant, ignorance, and paternalistic, and the U.S. government should not be collaborating or looking the other way to it. These are the things that later give credence to arguments of chickens coming home to roost. Christian Evangelicals in Iraq are a time-bomb waiting to explode, and you might just be the person near it!

Christian Evangelicals in Iraq: A Time-Bomb Waiting to Explode - Information Clearing House, 25th January 2004.

Fundamentalism has Spawned an Ideology of American Supremacy

United States: George Soros offers an insight into the fundies that run the US.

...At present the country is in the process of committing such mistakes because it is in the hands of a group of extremists whose strong sense of mission is matched only by their false sense of certitude.
This distorted view postulates that because we are stronger than others, we must know better and we must have right on our side. That is where religious fundamentalism comes together with market fundamentalism to form the ideology of American supremacy.

The US is now in the hands of a group of extremists - The Guardian, 26th January 2004.

January 29, 2004

Superstition in strange places.

When I'm flying, I like to think that my safety is guaranteed thanks to the endless vigilance of teams of maintenance engineers, well-trained crews and alert security staff. So seeing this at Edinburgh Airport (EDI/EGPH) one morning isn't too comforting:

Gate 12; Gate 12B; Gate 14.

(Click for large version) Picture taken 08:35, Friday 16th January 2004. Many airlines have a similar lack of faith in their own competence, and their aircraft have no row 13. The airline I flew with was not one of these.

Pyromaniac corner

The BBC has a picture gallery of this year's Up Helly Aa fire festival in Lerwick. In pictures: Up Helly Aa - BBC News, 28th January 2004.

Catholic Segregation Scheme

Scotland: In one of the lamest excuses to get out of a commitment, the Catholic Church is threatening to cut and run on a school scheme unless they're allowed to build in segregation.

Senior Catholic Church officials have said they will to call a halt on the project to use seven primary school sites in Lanarkshire unless they get written assurances that there will be separate entrances, staff lavatories and nurseries for the different faiths.

Catholic Church may pull out of school-share deal in Scotland - The Independent, 27th January 2004.

It's Always the Satanic Cult to Blame

Italy: Almost 20 years after the last murder blamed on the Monster of Florence, investigators have reopened the case because they suspect a Satanic cult ordered the killings and kept body parts as prizes — as you do.

The villa was rented by a doctor, thought to have drowned in a Tuscan lake in 1985. But when authorities recently discovered he was a suspected Satanist and had actually been murdered, they reopened their files... Investigators now suspect the doctor was part of a clan that ordered the Monster to kill eight couples.

Storing body parts for 20 years has got to take up some freezer space.

Satanic cult probed in Monster of Florence murders - Reuters, 23rd January 2004.

January 27, 2004

The Word of the Lord via IRC

The Netherlands: Just what you need to get the kids to really connect with the Lord; the original IRC logs to the Bible. As we all know, the Word of God was originally delivered in the form of an online chat.

Jesus Does PowerPoint

Canada: Well, charts at least. With comments to the peanut gallery.

Enough with the leper questions. Let's get back on topic - Graham Roumieu (via HogBlog).

January 26, 2004

Bare Scuddies

February 12th marks the 40th anniversary of the death of Gerald Gardner - the man who invented Wicca with Doreen Valiente. To mark the occasion, his local paper the Liverpool Echo has printed an article about the man and his claim that witches turned back Hitler's invasion forces. Was Hitler defeated by witchcraft? - Liverpool Echo, 26th January 2004.

January 25, 2004

Avoiding temptation

So, you're a teenager, and we all know how hard it is to not bonk, and those who promote abstinence also know that their ideology is about as sensible as promoting holding one's breath to avoid asthma. So, they have used all their knowledge of teenagers to put together a list of useful suggestion for young couples, which will put all thoughts of sex out of their minds. Suggestions like:

  • Play hide-and-seek in a cornfield.
  • Play Twister.
  • Take a walk on the beach.
  • Take a hike in the woods.
  • Play in the leaves.
  • Look at the stars (and share your ideas about life on other planets!).
  • Invent a new game.

Nope, no possibilities for things to turn sexual in any of that.

Funny love

Bisexual, Pagan Livejournal user princesswitch received a tract in the post. Instead of throwing it away immediately, she read it.

I also got a long tract--maybe I should call it a brochure--called When a Loved One Says, 'I'm Gay'. It痴 meant to tell conservative Christians how to deal with gay children, friends, and spouses. Bob Davies, an ex-gay man who was once an Exodus leader, wrote it. Mike Haley and John Paulk were part of the editing. I finally looked at it two days ago. Some of the advice is actually pretty good. But a lot of it, especially the stuff that relates to kids, shocked me! I shouldn't be shocked, but I was anyhow. They ask people to treat their kid's coming out practically like the kid is dead!

And then she went on to comment on it, at length, and concludes:

And praying that queer loved ones will experience the consequences of sin! Words fail me, but I'll try. What consequences does Davies have in mind? AIDS? STDs? A broken heart? Why does he wish any kind of pain on unrepentant gays and lesbians? (You'll be sorry you didn't listen to me!) Is one supposed to wish terrible things onto other sinners, too? And with prayers like that, why is it that we Witches and Vodouisants are the ones who are accused of dishing out the curses right and left?!
Say what you will, but no P-FLAG brochure or coming-out manual urges that you pray for your unrepentantly homophobic parents to experience the consequences of their homophobia.

Why can't I get a nice letter bomb or death threat in the mail? - Jayelle's Front Porch, 24th January 2004 (via Ex-gay Watch). See also Love Wins Some, Love Loses Some, the article referred to in the original post.

January 23, 2004

Goose, gander, sauce.

United States: The American Family Association has gone back on its promise to take the result of its poll on gay marriage to Capitol Hill.

But the AFA never counted on the power of the Internet. And once the URL to the poll escaped its intended audience, everything went haywire. As of Jan. 19, 60 percent of respondents -- more than 508,000 voters -- said, I favor legalization of homosexual marriage. With an additional 7.89 percent -- or 66,732 voters -- replying, I favor a 'civil union' with the full benefits of marriage except for the name, the AFA's chosen position, I oppose legalization of homosexual marriage and 'civil unions,' was being defeated by a 2-1 ratio.

Having tried to publicise the poll to their own supporters, and no-one else, they claim that the Evil Homosexual Conspiracy has done what they tried to do:

We're very concerned that the traditional state of marriage is under threat in our country by homosexual activists, said AFA representative Buddy Smith. It just so happens that homosexual activist groups around the country got a hold of the poll -- it was forwarded to them -- and they decided to have a little fun, and turn their organizations around the country (onto) the poll to try to cause it to represent something other than what we wanted it to. And so far, they succeeded with that.

Gay Marriage Poll Gets Annulled Wired News, 22nd January 2004.

Prayers In Case Of Sin

Israel: An Israeli rabbi has composed a prayer to help devout Jews overcome guilt after visiting porn web sites while browsing the Internet.

Pope Pimps Flick

The Vatican: Succumbing to the lure of commercialisation, the grand poohbah of the Catholics touts Mel Gibson's vanity pic.

The Vatican has always been scrupulous in preventing the Pope's name from being linked to commercial products. But after a private viewing of Mel Gibson's forthcoming film about the Crucifixion, Pope John Paul II reportedly commented: It is as it was. For five weeks that pithy, invaluable endorsement of the film Gibson has made with his own money, about the final 12 hours in the life of Jesus, was allowed to stand.

Vatican anger over crucifixion film claim - The Independent, 21 January 2004.

January 22, 2004

Loathesome Combination of Church and State

United States: In an attempt to put the hard word on politicians to tow the Catholic line and oppose abortion and euthanasia, Bishop Raymond Burke, of the La Crosse diocese issued a ten page pastoral letter titled, On the Dignity of Human Life and Civic Responsibility [PDF]. His preferred method of arm twisting is to refuse to allow the offenders to participate in holy communion.

Local reaction to the letter has been mixed both from various fundie groups and from state legislators.

The people of La Crosse can be happy that Bishop Burke will be leaving soon to take up new challenges elsewhere, but the people of St Louis should be aware that their new Archbishop has no qualms about sending a few politicians to hell who happen to vote the way their constituents want them to. It's clergymen like this that led Thomas Jefferson to write about this loathesome combination of Church and State.

Wisconsin Bishop Attempts To Sway Politicians By Denying Communion - morons.oeg, 11th January 2004.

January 21, 2004

Undemonising the Child

United States: Looks like another pair of fundies will be pleading the cast out the devil for your own good defence.

A husband and wife have been charged with murdering a 6-year-old girl whose back was broken in what police said may have been an exorcism gone wrong...

January 20, 2004

Santa Researcher Makes List, Checks It Twice

United States: Kids these days don't smile when they visit Santa Claus, according to research performed by Ig Nobel Prize winner John Trinkaus of the Zicklin School of Business. Professor Trinkaus observed children at two large shopping malls and a major department store, noting each child's facial expression as the children visited Santa Claus. Every child was accompanied by a parent or guardian.

What Professor Trinkaus saw surprised and saddened him. More than 95% of the children were visibly indifferent or hesitant as they approached Santa. Only one percent of them smiled or showed other signs of happiness. On the other hand, Professor Trinkaus noted, nearly all of the parents were visibly quite happy and excited.

Late Holiday Thoughts

United States: Religious musings from the DNRC universe.

If you're following the news, you know that the major religions differ in their interpretation of the holy books. For example, one way to interpret God's will is that you should love your neighbor. An alternate reading of the holy books might lead you to rig a donkey cart with small mortar rockets and aim it at a hotel full of infidels. In summary, po-tay-to, poh-tah-to. Religions are very flexible, and that's a loophole that the DNRC should exploit, especially during the holiday season.
Imagine, if you will, that all DNRC members moved their holiday gift-buying from December to January to take advantage of the sales. Then imagine that the money saved on gifts is invested at 5% compounded interest for 80 years. You'll be dead by then, but your estates would be worth literally hundreds of dollars, maybe more. Anyway, the point is that it's easier to park at the mall in January, and that's something that Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha would all agree is a good thing. Especially Buddha, if you know what I mean.
Personally, I want a religion that says it's okay for me to RECEIVE gifts, while warning that I'll burn in hell forever if I try to GIVE any. Furthermore, if I open a gift that seems poorly thought-out, it would be my religious obligation to smash it against a wall while the giver watches in horror. Some people might say to me, Hey, where did you get that religion? Did you pull it out of your @$$? But people are polite and rarely ask that sort of question even when you think they should.

A Little Ray of Bitter Sunshine - Dilbert Newsletter 52.0, December 2003.

January 19, 2004

Murder in the Name of God

United States: Instead of running about the Middle East accidentally murdering the populace 'cause all those durn Ay-rahbs look the same, perhaps the Yanks should be looking a little closer to home at the terrorists in their own backyard.

Female Circumcision Surgical Package

Indonesia: It's Indonesia's biggest secret. Most of its women have been subjected to an operation which the World Health Organisation says is unnecessary.

Hospitals across Indonesia are offering new parents a one-price surgical package for their just-born girls — when they pierce their ears, they'll circumcise the girls as well.

January 18, 2004

Taking a Swing at the Guys in Silly Hats

The Vatican: When taking the stage for her part in the recording Christmas concert attended by top Vatican cardinals, bishops and many elite of Italian society, Lauryn Hill took full advantage of her captive audience and took a swing at the Catholic Church's stance on protecting the paedophiles in their midst.

Report Examines Kiddie Fiddling Priests

United States: The Miami Archdiocese has revealed that thirty-eight priests have been accused of sexually abusing children during the archdiocese's 45-year history. It is just one archdiocese of many airing its dirty laundry and forwarding reports to the John Jay School of Criminal Justice for inclusion in a report commissioned by the US Conference of Catholic Bishops.

January 17, 2004

Methodist Church to Try Gay Pastor

United States: Had to keep the title on this one, because I originally misunderstood it to mean that the church was an open, all-embracing community who were having a trial run with a gay pastor, rather than a bunch of loony fundies getting their knickers in a twist and sending the poor woman off to Coventry.

Fundies Dismantling Iraqi Women's Rights

Iraq: With a fundie loon currently chairing the Iraqi Puppet Council under a rotating leadership system, the conservative wankers snuck in a change to the legal system, Iraqi family law will no longer be secular — it is now going to be according to Islamic Shari'a.

January 15, 2004

Mormons Posthumously Baptising All and Sundry

United States: Did you know that many of Hitler's victims were actually Mormons? Neither did he (or any of them for that matter), but the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is making sure of it.

Angelic Leaders of the World

Free Press International has compiled just a few of the many photographs mainstream media has been deliberately releasing to the public showing our world leaders with halos. The devil is indeed in the details.

What's The Deal Mainstream Media? - Free Press International (via Boing Boing Blog).

January 14, 2004

Pet Foil Hat Technology

Canada: Before your pet's brainwaves are hijacked by the government, invest in a Pet Foil Hat Technology (PFHT).

January 13, 2004

Unlucky for some

Japan: The winner of a race for an amulet, supposed to bring good luck, has been exposed as a cheat just days later.

Over the weekend, a 22-year-old Osaka firefighter snared a token said to offer fortune to the first person who grabbed it in a Nishinomiya Shrine race with a tradition that dates back centuries.

But the winner has returned to the prize to shrine priests following an outbreak of protests from viewers of the televised race who complained that he was aided by others who held back competitors and gave him an easy path to the amulet.

My fighting friends effectively blocked others, the firefighter said. I'm terribly sorry to the other participants.

Gods frown on cheating 'lucky' runnerMainichi Daily News, 13th January 2004.

A letter to another editor

United States: Rob Veras felt compelled to write to the Indianapolis Star concerning one of the burning issues of the day:

Spears taints image of heterosexual marriage
The fact that Britney Spears was able to go to Las Vegas, get married on a whim and have the marriage annulled just hours later proves that people don't need to worry about same-sex couples ruining the sanctity of marriage. Heterosexuals have done enough to it already.

Letters to the Editor - Indianapolis Star, 9th January 2004 (thanks Larry).

Bargain of the Day: tasteful desktop fountain

Relax with a Serenity Prayer Table top Water Fountain, which is a Serenity Prayer Desktop Fountain with Rose and Cross on opposite Side.

A soothing and spiritual desk fountain, offering a stone-look plaque with a carved cross on one side, and the Serenity Prayer on the other. River stones included. Uses 2 AA batteries - not included. Measures: 7 1/4" diameter x 9" high.

January 12, 2004

Poetic Justice

United States: Patricia Parra, a 60-year-old bell ringer for the Salvation Army who suffers from cerebral palsy, was working at a store in South Tucson, Arizona, when Edward Sanders grabbed her collection kettle, containing all of $54, and ran. As he dashed across the street to make his getaway he was run over by a car.

Scrooged - Tuscon Weekly, 1st January 2004 (via Dodgeblogium).

Dirty Secrets Aired in Public

United States: Mark Morford capures the essential stupidity of harassing innocent people in the name of security by pointing out that anybody's dirty secrets could be aired in public.

And look there, look how that conservative Christian U.S. congressman is just so red faced and enraged when they search through his manly black Samsonite carry-on and find, well, not just a nice new Bible and clean white Jockey underwear and assorted envelopes of cash from the director of Destroy Gay Marriage Now! of Colorado Springs, Colo.

Look there, just under the argyle sweaters and the signed head shot from Pat Robertson, at the stash of sticky Honcho magazines and some Hello Kitty Speedos and, lo and behold, the metal in the congressman's boots induces an unfortunate backroom strip search, where what do we see but the assorted bright red welts of spankdom as incurred from Mistress Carlita's Pleasure Bunker in downtown Phoenix, from the night before. Oh, Congressman.

Scenes From A Sad Airport - SF Gate, 9th January 2004.

January 11, 2004

Bargain of the Day: a bit of string

Today's bargain is not the sterotypically attractive blonde in the photograph, but a bit of string. Of course, we wouldn't mention just any old bit of string - this is a KABBALAH RED STRING BRACELET KIT!

Recently made famous by the likes of Madonna, Demi Moore, Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and many more Hollywood types. The Red String symbolizes the protection from the influences of the Evil Eye. The Evil Eye is a very powerful negative force. It refers to the unfriendly stare and unkind glances we sometimes get from people around us. According to Kabbalah, the critical need to confront the problem of negative influences cannot be underestimated. Kabbalah teaches us that we can remove intrusive negative influences by using tools such as the Red String! This kit comes with 5 red strings long enough for any wrist. Also comes with the tie-knot instructions, the story behind the red string and Rachel's tomb, as well as the Ben Porat Prayer which is used to give the string energy and strength.

Coming soon from Pagan Prattle Products - the blue string of fertility.

January 10, 2004

Those evil heterosexuals

Japan: An official of a religious group has been arrested on suspicion of molesting a high school girl. He told police he did it because he was interested in women.

Religious group official pinched for molesting schoolgirlMainichi Daily News, 10th January 2004.

Bargain of the Day: someone to pray for you

A mere $39.99 (US) will get you an interesting service - Buy my prayers for YOU to get into HEAVEN!

All you have to do is buy this simple ebay auction, and I'll send you a one-of-a-kind certificate, suitable for framing, describing how I will pray for your safe passage into eternal happiness in the presence of God in Heaven. I've always felt a responsibility to pray for my brothers and sisters in spirituality to stay pure and get into heaven. I've also felt it is important to do for a living what you do best in life. That's why I'm offering this certificate of my prayers, in 20 minute per week increments, for only the price of this ebay auction! Please take a moment to think about your eternal soul. Take a moment to consider the future--everlasting life and happiness. Isn't it worth it?

There is, of course, no guarantee that the vendor's imaginary friend will pay any attention whatsoever.

Christmas Ornaments are Evil

Saudi Arabia: The morality police are out in force and they are determined to stamp out annoying commercialised Western holiday paraphenalia.

January 9, 2004

Changing Attitudes, One Soap at a Time

Israel: The Middle East Non-Violence and Democracy group created a radio soap opera — Home Is Our Home — targetted at young Palestinians and aimed at promoting nonviolent resolution to conflict.

Tug of War Over Jesus

United States: If Nicholas Kristof's predictions for a presidential campaign bent on grovelling to the moral moronity of the loony fundie faction prove true, the we will soon be up to our eyeballs in stories from the lunatic fringe gone mainstream.

January 7, 2004

Past superstitions brought into light.

Builders have found a mummified cat, a broom, a small skull and a pair of shoes behind a wall in a Suffolk house. Police are now checking if the skull is human. Macabre find behind bedroom wall - East Anglian Daily Times, 7th January 2003.

US Fundies Pushing Their Own Foreign Policy

Israel: The evangelical fundies, having found the pleasures gained in fleecing the gullible are waning, have started flexing their muscles in the arena of foreign policy. They seem hell-bent on rewriting history to serve their fairy tale belief in the end times, by bringing in about in their own lifetime.

Praise the Lord and Pass the Sunscreen

United States: With a long history of prudish behaviour and a culture that glorifies violence and fears sex, Bill Martin may be living in land of wishful thinking with his plans to convert 240 acres of rubbish strewn land about 30 miles outside Tampa into a nudist playground for Christians.

January 6, 2004

Blast from the past

While rummaging through some old SAFF material, trying to answer a query, I found this gem which had previously escaped my notice:

Brain-dead preacher goes where no other brain-dead preachers have never gone before: In the fundmantalist newspaper New Life a headline screams out PREACHER'S VISION LINKS WITCHCRAFT TO M1 PLANE CRASH. The gist of the story is that Clifford Hill, widely regarded by Christian leaders as a prophet of our time, has discovered that the Kegworth Plane Crash which killed 56 people when it crash landed on the M1 during 1989 (because the pilot shut down the wrong engine), was caused by witches. He was shown a clear vision of a witches' coven beyond the runway and in a direct line with it which through its contact with the powers of darkness was causing confusion in the cockpit at the time.... Further on we read that not only are witches responsible for that crash but also the Purley rail crash which killed thirty people and the lightening [sic.] strike on York Minster which destroyed the west wing a few years ago.

The bulletin goes on to point out that Clifford Hill is the editor of Prophecy Today and the guiding light behind World Prophecy Ministries. See that link? The magazine is still with us, and they have an online presence! Right now it has the sort of obsession with homosexuality which causes most people to shout out closet!, but the old occult conspiracy has not been forgotten - read The Occult and Children's TV - A Parent's Perspective from a mere two years ago.

Occult Information Interchange Bulletin 6, December 1990. The real cause of the crash was, as suggested, the wrong engine being shut down, but a change in the instrumentation contributed to this:

The change from hybrid electro-mechanical instruments to LED displays for engine indications has reduced conspicuity, particularly in respect of the engine vibration indicators. No additional vibration alerting system was fitted that could have highlighted to the pilots which of the two engines was vibrating excessively.

The witches must've been working on human interface design at Boeing then. Aircraft Accident Report No: 4/90 (EW/C1095). Report on the accident to Boeing 737-400 - G-OBME near Kegworth, Leicestershire on 8 January 1989 - Air Accidents Investigation Branch, April 1990.

Cobblers round-up

An inquiry into the death of Princess Diana begins today and, to mark the occasion, The Register looks at a few of the conspiracies surrounding her demise. After all, it couldn't have been a speeding drunk driver! Lady Di inquest scrambles black helicopter brigade - The Register, 6th January 2004.

Religions Cause War — Except Mine

United States: A recent poll in Minnesota shows that most respondents believe religion, except Christianity, has a role in world conflicts.

My Invisible Friend Made Me Do It

United States: Most of us have known bullies and their tactics at some point in our lives. Saul Landau discusses uber-bullies and what happens when a loony fundie uber-bully gets into a position of power.

January 5, 2004

Bargain of the Day: book

The vendor warns us IF YOU FEAR SATAN; DON'T BUY THIS ITEM! IN FACT; DON'T EVEN LOOK AT IT. What cultbuster is selling is a rather, erm, interesting e-book:

Take a good look at the photo accompanying this item.It is from a CBS 60 Minutes broadcast Oct.5th,2003 which included an actual live filming of one of the satanic rituals of the anglo/german cult that worships the goddessEulogia!This cult's current admitted membership includes; President Bush,Senator Kerry,SEC head,William Donaldson,Ed McNally,general counsel of Homeland Security,and Robert MacCallum,asst.Attorney General.NOTE:this item for auction is a 259 page online book...not a film or movie(yet).The truth,in this case,is much stranger and exceedingly more threatening toward the American people than fiction.Abraham Lincoln said it in 1856;Americans have a DUTY to KNOW and FACE the TRUTH.The only question is,will America's citizens continue to sleep at the switch..or wake up and use the democratic means at our disposal to return our government to a government OF THE PEOPLE?!This 259 page item for auction provides the evidence and details proving the following:A:The cult is headquartered in Germany.B;Members of the American branch have been burrowing into American business and government in order to implement their goals of world domination and suppression of the citizenry.C:The members swear allegiance to the pagan goddess Eulogia and then to each other.D: The cult embraces and demands of its members thievery,trickery(which includes lying;e.g. pretending to be Christian),and war engineering as good things;tools for expanding the power and wealth of its members.E: The cult members have been instrumental,alongside their European brothers,in causing most of the horrors over the past 100 years;1. they financed Hitler's rize to power and supplied his nazi machine.2.they developed the atomic bomb;cult member G.L.Harrison cabled cultmember Henry Stimson the announcement of the 1st.atomic test bomb in N.Mexico as follows;a child is born,larger than expected,you can hear its cries for 40 miles and see the light in its eyes for 200 miles;they also decided to drop 2 A bombs on Japanese cities in rapid succession to kill as many barbarian children as possible before the certain surrender.3.Cult members A.Harriman and the Bundy brothers engineered the Vietnam war.4:The cult controls the Bush Regime.They delayed the takeover of Iraq for 10+ years in order to have total control of post-war Iraq.5:Opium and oil have long been the bread and butter of the cult's secret operations and wealth creation.Hence,the skyrocketing increase in Afghan opium production since the Bush team took over Afghanistan.One final eyewitness account of one the cults' wedding ceremonies;"during the ceremony,which was officiated by a patriarch in his mid-eighties, the Bonesmen wore black,hooded robes and intoned chants while waving rods over a coffin,summoning spirits from below, Step 1: find out more:for auction,the online version of the 259 page dossier by Jim Stonewall Robey,which will be SENT TO YOU BY EMAIL (no shipping charges). SATISFACTION GUARANTEED OR MONEY REFUNDED.PLEASE NOTE:this is an online book...not a movie(yet)

Real men don't eat tofu

New Zealand: Go easy on that chocolate soya milk - according to Ian Wishart, editor of Investigatge magazine, it can turn you into a screaming nancy boy!

We don't really know why homosexuality exists, he pondered, although the mere fact that it does would offer some pretty strong proof that Darwin's Theory of Evolution is seriously flawed... there is also some fascinating scientific research that indicates the massive increase in the use of soy milk over the past four decades has contributed to increased levels of homosexuality among men...

Unfortunately, neither a leading Australasian health foods company nor Chris Banks of GayNZ.com have any knowledge of this stunning research:

A search by GayNZ.com for information on the internet, usually a teeming repository for bizarre claims, yielded few hits. Although there are various organisations concerned about the alleged side-effects of soy consumption, gayness doesn't appear to be amongst them. The few obscure sources returned in our search that did seemed to put connections between soy products and homosexuality in the area of urban legend.

I was shopping with my four year old son and picked up a carton of soy milk, says Mandy, a contributor to the online Compleat Mother Forum. A lady shopping near me saw that and pulled me over to tell me that I was endangering my son's health by feeding him soy milk... and I would be hindering his 'male' growth by feeding him soy milk before puberty! I have never heard of such a thing. I don't think she meant to upset me, but the way she talked it was pretty scary.

I don't know if she meant I would be creating a homosexual person. I have no 'fear' of that. I will love my son no matter what his sexual orientation will be. I also don't see how feeding him soy will make him gay.

Investigate pointed them at Soy Online Service which has a slightly consporatorial tone about it.

The soy industry is one of the world's most wealthy and powerful and one that will steamroll anybody that dares suggest there may be problems with the darling soy, runs the website's intro. When we first questioned the safety of soy a representative of [company name omitted] told us that they had teams of lawyers to crush dissenters, could buy scientists to give evidence, owned television channels and newspapers, could divert medical schools and could even influence governments.

Banks continued to follow all the links he had been given and still turned up nothing of any significance.

Back to Wishart's reply to GayNZ.com: A cursory five minute flick through Google turned up about 6,000 items of interest, a couple of which I've copied below. There are a number of chemicals regarded as 'gender benders' by the scientific community... if you search through some of the links you'll discover 'lesbian seagulls' and 'gay fish' following environmental pollution.

This is fascinating, if not old, information: homosexuality has been well-documented throughout the animal kingdom. The only problem is, none of the links provided by Wishart indicated any links between increased levels of homosexuality among men and massive increases in the amount of soy milk consumption, and this was the claim Wishart made.

He did not investigate whether the tofu-mad Japanese have a higher rate of homosexuality than anywhere else. I suspect they don't. Dead Birds, Darth Vader, and "Homo" Soy - An Investigation!GayNZ.com, 11th December 2003 (thanks John).

Pastor Buck

Uganda: An investigation by the National Fellowship of Born Again Christian Churches into a leading pastor has found no evidence that he was a devil-worshipping witch who sacrificed babies. An American woman had made the allegations against Pastor Simeon Kayiwa. He puts her actions down to jealousy, personal disagreements and competition. A police investigation continues. Committee Clears Kayiwa of Murder - The monitor (via allAfrica.com, 3rd January 2004; See also Leading pastor accused of witchcraft - Pagan Prattle, 21st April 2003.

It's all headology

Lucky charms don't improve a carrier's chance of winning the lottery, but they do make them feel luckier, which has beneficial knock-on effects on confidence and success.

The study, by Professor Richard Wiseman of the Psychology Department of the University of Hertfordshire, found that carrying a charm had no effect on the chances of choosing winning lottery numbers.
But 30% of those tested felt their luck had improved.
Nearly all those who did report increased luck had said prior to the study that they expected the charm to work, suggesting the charm's efficacy was based on expectation.

It's All in the Mind - The Scotsman, 5th January 2004.

The Politico-Christian Right

United States: It's getting harder for the fundies in power to cover their slips in godliness as they do whatever if takes for personal gain.

Religious Wars in the United States

United States: Brian Morton takes a humorous look at how America is fast turning into the exact thing that supposedly prompted a war on Iraq — being a bunch of intolerant religious fundamentalists devoid of democracy.

January 3, 2004

Bribery and Corruption

United States: Abundant Life Christian Center in La Marque, near Houston have resorted to bribery to get bums on seats.

Michael Jackson, Cult Magnet

United States: Rumour has it that officials of the Nation of Islam, a separatist African-American Muslim group, have shacked up with the singer.

Efforts to reach Jackson through his spokesman were not successful, but his lawyer, Mark Geragos, and The Final Call, the Nation of Islam's newspaper denied the claim. Initially invited to the Neverland Ranch near Santa Barbara several weeks ago to provide security for Jackson, members of the Nation of Islam are now restricting access to him and have begun making decisions for him related to the news media, his business affairs and even his legal strategy, Jackson's friends and associates said.

I would have thought that Michael Jackson is more than capable of behaving like a wingnut of his own accord without the aid of yet another bunch of religious loonies.

Dispute in Michael Jackson Camp Over Role of the Nation of Islam - New York Times, 31st December 2003.

January 1, 2004

Bargain of the Day: psychic jewellery

Psychic Sylvia Brown has been working with a jeweller to bring you an exclusive selection of exquisitely designed jewelry that conveys a special spiritual message from Sylvia. This message is designed to give meaning to anyone who aspires to be God centered.

Every piece within this line of jewelry contains a symbol of three interlaced circles that is meant to remind us of three important words in our life to help us stay on the path:

Gratitude: To be grateful for not only our life, but also the fact that God gave us the opportunity to learn in this world so we can ascend to a higher level.

Loyalty: To be zealous and accountable, not only to God, but to each other. To keep our focus on what is righteous and good and never waiver.

Commitment: To be committed to our path whether full of joy or sadness, but to never waiver in our goal to do good.

Annual end-of-the-world post 2004

So, how many ways will the world come to an end in 2004?

About this Archive

This page is an archive of entries from January 2004 listed from newest to oldest.

December 2003 is the previous archive.

February 2004 is the next archive.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.

Resources

About this site
Contact the Prattle
Ego Corner

The Pagan Prattle
c/o P.O. Box 666
Edinburgh EH7 5YW
Scotland

Syndication

Licence

Creative Commons License
The original material in this weblog is licensed under a Creative Commons License.