Loony Fundie Nonsense for the Masses
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United States: Thank you to the correspondent who mailed me with a pointer to this PUBLIC NOTICE REFERENCING THE FUTURE LEADER OF OUR TOWN, published by the eventual winner in an election in a northern Louisiana town. Written in all caps (which, as 'Contributor B' of Mistakes Were Made observes, can make anything more important
.) it features the excellent grammar we have come to associate with loony fundies:
TO ALL THE FATHER'S, MOTHER'S, DAUGHTER'S, SON'S, BROTHER'S, SISTER'S & CHRISTIAN PEOPLE OF []
The purpose of the flyer? To point out that another candidate isn't an uncircumcised, but righteous, person.
IT IS A FACT THAT ONE CANDIDATE, IN THE OCTOBER 5, 2002 ELECTION, DOES NOT BELIEVE IN JESUS CHRIST. BECAUSE IF SHE DID, SHE WOULD NOT LIVE THE LIFESTYLE (ROMANS 2:26) THAT SHE DOES. HOW DOES THIS CANDIDATE THINK THAT ANY GOD FORGIVING PERSON WOULD CHOOSE THEM FOR A LEADER.
Oops. Or perhaps he got the wrong quote, as his real problem seems to be that she is a lesbian.
IT IS A FACT THAT THIS CANDIDATE LIVES WITH ANOTHER WOMAN WHO IS KNOWN TO BE HER GIRLFRIEND AND CONTINUOUSLY SAYS THATSHE WILL MARRY THIS WOMAN ONE DAY. WHERE IS GOD IN THIS LIFESTYLE???
And, perhaps giving a hint as to how he planned to behave when elected, he continued:
LADIES, WHAT DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN IF THIS CANDIDATE IS ELECTED CHIEF OF POLICE AND YOU ARE PULLED OVER ON A ROUTINE TRAFFIC STOP. DO YOU THINK THAT YOU WILL JUST GET A TICKET, OR DO YOU THINK THAT YOU WILL GET PROPOSITIONED?
Is she cute? Oh, hang on, she's in a stable committed relationship, isn't she? Drat.
FATHER'S AND MOTHER'S; THINK ABOUT YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTERS JUST LEARNING TO DRIVE. WHAT DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN IF THEY ARE PULLED OVER BY THIS CANDIDATE? WHAT IF THEY ARE IN DISTRESS AND NEED A WORD OF COMFORT. WHAT KIND OF COMFORT DO YOU THINK THIS CANDIDATE IS GOING TO OFFER?
HUSBAND'S, BOYFRIEND'S, JUST FRIENDS; THINK ABOUT THIS. WHAT IF YOU AND YOUR LADY FRIEND HAVE A DISAGREEMENT ABOUT SOMETHING AND SHE CALLS FOR THE POLICE AND THIS CANDIDATE ANSWERS THE CALL. WHO DO YOU THINK SHE WILL DEFEND, REGARDLESS OF WHO IS RIGHT OR WRONG?
Posted in
Church and State
at 18:23. Last modified on July 14 2009 at 16:45.
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