January 1, 2008

Annual end-of-the-world post 2008

So, none of last year's predictions concerning the end of the world have come true. Nor has there been any sign of Jesus. This, of course, will not stop the prophets of doom. So, what can we expect in 2008?

Last year, we started with ARMAGEDDON 2007 EZEKIEL 4 TIME PROPHECY JERUSALEM ISRAEL PROPHECIES. The person behind the site has not been put off by the predictions failing to come to pass and the page has now been born again as Bible Prophecy Revelations Armageddon 2008.

Though Armageddon did not commence in 2007 as we expected, the process leading to that war sometime in 2008, has begun.

The predictions for Jerusalem remain intact, with a disclaimer.

If probation for the Jews ended in 2007, how far are we from this dreadful war? We've already stated here on the eve of 2008 we believe it's just a couple of months away now!

And some gratuitous homophobia:

Why is such a war needed? The land of Israel has been flagrantly defiled. We believe such a war is needed to prevent the opening of any more brothels and casinos in the Holy Land! We believe such a war is needed to prevent Tel Aviv from becoming the gay capital of the world! We believe such a war is needed to prevent any more gay marches from defiling Jerusalem!

I suspect that San Francisco, Brighton and similar places hold no fear that lgbt tourists will take their money to Tel Aviv any time soon, no matter how sunny it is.

To Infinity And Beyond! has only one possibility for the coming year, and it's one of Marilyn Agee's many dates for the start of the end-times:

PRE-TRIB RAPTURE, FIRST "TRUMP OF GOD" Probably Pentecost, Sivan 6, 5768 (June 9, 2008)

TEMPLE CONSTRUCTION BEGINS
Sacrifice of the red heifer when she is four years old (she is 3.5 now)
Priests, purified with the ashes of the red heifer, start building the Temple after the Rapture

THE BEGINNING OF THE TRIBULATION, 1ST SEAL
SEVENTH DAY OF UNLEAVENED BREAD - Pre-Trib Rapture, April 26, 2008
Beginning of the 2300 days of Dan. 8:12-14 (Jewish inclusive reckoning)
First beast begins to rule...

Another obsessive cataloguer has produced The Doomsday List, which should make this job much easier in future years. The compiler notes that the majority of predictions for 2008 come from Bible Code nerds The Lord's Witnesses. They use the Jewish Calendar, but with Gregorian years, just to confuse us, and admit that they have made many mistakes in the past. Their favourite prediction concerns a nuclear strike on New York, which has been failing to happen for two years now. The most recent dates for this have passed without incident:

We now believe and calculate that it must happen somewhere along the East Coast of the US between Washington and NYC possibly at Annapolis but more likely at the UN Tower in Manhattan from 2007Tebbeth4 to 2007Tebbeth7

That's between Thursday, 13 December 2007 and Sunday, 16 December 2007. A further refinement of this has been made, but it's still in the past:

We now calculate that somewhere on the East Coast of the USA, between Washington and NYC, possibly at Anapolis or more likely at the UN Tower in Manhattan, will be hit by a sea borne dirty bomb or nuclear bomb on or before Saturday December 22nd, 2007

Here's the list of dates which will be refined in the next year:

2008 February 3/4, 2007Shebat21. The little horn of the EU corrupts the UNGA and God's people are given into his hand for 3½ Times, which are months, 105 days, until we are rescued by Jesus on 2008Sivan6.

2008 March21, 2008Nisan14, Satan loses throne and kingdom and authority, but UN does not yet, it battles with the lamb during Armageddon....

2008 March23, 2008Nisan16, Kingdom of God begins.

2008 May 5, 2008Iyyar29. The Sign of the Son of man appears in heaven at the end of the 1335 days of Daniel 12. The faithful are happy as described in Daniel 12.

2008 May 12, 2008Sivan6. Jesus comes, the 1NC saints descend as humans. They start gathering the church sons of the 1AC together to be raptured. The door of Noah is closed, no more first time entrance into the LWs, the ICC is closed other than rebpatisms. The faithless say: Lord, Lord!! The UNPBC has its second head cut off.

2008 September 18/19, 2008Tishri15. Earthly celebration of the 2NC by the great crowd, all the sons of the CRC and by all those who are raptured and by all the saints, the sons of the ARC.

2008 October 3/4, 2008Tishri30. Miriam, the sealed 1NC saints, is permitted back into the camp in heaven. 7 year kingship Malediction on 1NC saints ends. The bride has prepared herself. The Marriage of the lamb can now begin. End of LW water baptism.

2008 October 4/5, 2008Heshvan1. This is the Megiddo administration or Har Megiddo or Armageddon. This administration fights Jesus for 150 days from 2008Hesvhan6 to 2008Nisan6.

2008 October 9/10, 2008Heshvan6. Last day of Zoar, the Rapture. The ark hits the mountains of Ararat after 150 days. The 5 times of the hand of Lot and his wife and his daughters end. The 616 days of UNGA authority over God's people ends with this rapture. 50% of mankind is beamed up as angels. The UN is still in existence at this time. The war of the great Day of Jehovah, the evening meal of God, begins. Jesus attacks the Megiddo administration for the next 150 days, since Lot escaped from the Midst of the overthrow of the cities of the religious administration of Sodom and of the secular administration of Gomorrah. Lot is in the gate of Sodom, but not in the gate of Gomorrah.

And something more tangible: The world will run out of Wheat in Q1, 2008!

T. Chase of Revelation 13 is still obsessed with Vladimir Putin and remains convinced that he is the Antichrist. The world population is also approaching a significant figure:

When the world population reaches 6.66 billion in about April 2008, that may be a terrorism caused by Iran and Al Qaeda, or this could be the rise of the Antichrist, Russian President Putin.

He also uses Bible Codes, and has some specific predictions for some specific places. His dates are less specific, as any of the following events could occur any time between 2008 and 2010. Those events are:

More precise dates for other events can be found on the Calendar page, where we see Christian astrology in action.

There are more Bible Code predictions at Satan's Rapture, but this site includes some more precise dates, including for May 2008, a terrorist attack using biological agents, probably Ebola, on Philadelphia in May 2008 and the assassination of Barak Obama and John Edwards, allowing Hilary Clinton to become US president in the November 2008 elections. Hilary Clinton is, of course, the Antichrist.

Another person convinced that the end is nigh in 2008 is Robert Weinland, author of 2008 - God's Final Witness. So convinced is he of this that he's made the book available as a free download, in four languages (English, Dutch, Spanish and Italian). He predicts four events will bring about the total collapse of the United States, the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and some countries of Western Europe (p. 116) and By the fall of 2008, the United States will have collapsed as a world power, or it will have begun its collapse and no longer exist as an independent nation within six months after that time (p. 244).

Let us not forget the true Russian Orthodox Church, the cult currently holed up awaiting the end of the world in May 2008.

Daniel Min also sees Armageddon this year:

But it's all merely academic at this point, seeing that the 2008 election will be cancelled, and far more importantly is the great tribulation, Armageddon unto end of the world, is clearly imminent, and there is nothing anyone can do to stop it, neither postpone it: any more than they can stop the revolutions of the planets in orbit.

1 comment

Leave a comment

Evangelism, witnessing and similar activitites go by one name here—advertising, and is no different from spam for viagra, penis enlargement products and pornography. We do not take advertising. If you want to advertise your imaginary friend, please spend your own money on your own web space to do so. Any attempts to use the comments section for advertisements will be deleted, and the perpetrator barred, unless they are particularly stupid, in which case I reserve the right to pinch an idea from Teresa Nielsen Hayden and delete all the vowels.

Allowed HTML: a href, b, br, p, strong, em, ol, ul, li, blockquote, q, pre. If your name has accents in it, things will (hopefully!) work better if you use the XHTML entities for those letters. The same applies if you are using a word processor to compose your comment, then copying and pasting the text—either turn off curly quotes and avoid using em-dashes, or edit your comment after pasting to get rid of them. Garbled comments usually get deleted.

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Feòrag published on January 1, 2008 12:00 AM.

More commentary on the creationist theme park was the previous entry in this blog.

Miscelleny is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.

Resources

About this site
Contact the Prattle
Ego Corner

The Pagan Prattle
c/o P.O. Box 666
Edinburgh EH7 5YW
Scotland

Syndication

Licence

Creative Commons License
The original material in this weblog is licensed under a Creative Commons License.