« Bargain of the Day: Jesus lighters | Main | Excuse of the year »
United Kingdom: There you are, King of the Witches and dead, dead powerful—you know you are because you told the tabloids loads of times, and they printed it, so it must be true. So what do you do with these amazing poweres? Bring about world peace, an end to hunger and a cure for AIDS? How about influencing the pop charts so that one piece of inane tripe is number one at Christmas, at the expense of another piece of inane tripe.
And Kevin [Carlyon, who else?] revealed the witches were also using their powers to try and keep Ozzy's single with daughter Kelly at the top of the charts for Christmas thwarting a rival effort by the Pop Idol finalists.
And for good measure, just to emphasise that you only do white magic, how about cursing Simon Cowell for being rude about Ozzy Osbourne? WITCHES' SPELL ON COWELL FOR OZZY BIKE SLUR—The Daily Record, 20th December 2003.
Posted in
Ho! Ho! Ho!
and King Kevin
and Popular Culture
at 00:57. Last modified on March 25 2007 at 15:40.
Permalink to this entry | View blog reactions
Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Lonely this Christmas:
» Witches for Ozzy from Dodgeblogium
It seems the UK's witches are rustling up a spell to make Ozzy is number one. Well if this is true more power to them. Anything to keep Sir Quiff and Pop Rubbish from the number one spot is a... [Read More]
Tracked on December 21, 2003 5:23 PM
» Witches for Ozzy from Dodgeblogium
It seems the UK's witches are rustling up a spell to make Ozzy is number one. Well if this is true more power to them. Anything to keep Sir Quiff and Pop Rubbish from the number one spot is a... [Read More]
Tracked on December 21, 2003 5:23 PM
Comments
1: Posted by: jonathan tokeley Ph.D | April 23, 2004 12:38 PM
Carlon may be regarded as a showboating buffoon, but there is a more sinister side. The Devon and Cornwall Police are now investigating a formal complaint made by a medical practitioner and a Romnan Catholic Priest that he has been employing tele-hypnosis---widely recognised as a shamanistic device in African cultures---to coerce one of his "clients" to become his acolyte. In short, to deprive her of free-will and make her his slave. The young woman has been subjected to a barrage of telepathic assault, and has shown the classic physiological symptoms that are now familiar to the medical profession from researched in Africa, and that ar also associated with the various cults in the US, of which the mass-suicide was merely the most extreme example. The Young woman has been exorcised by Jesuits (the catholic Church keep an exorcist in each diocese for this specific purpose, since catholics seems especially vulberable to mailgn spiritualism), and is now surrounded by thiose who wish to protect her. I am hioping that any others who have been similarly caught on the wrong end of Carlyon's efforts would contact me, as I am preparing an article for publication.
Evangelism, witnessing and similar activitites go by one name here—, and is no different from spam for viagra, penis enlargement products and pornography. We do not take advertising. If you want to advertise your imaginary friend, please spend your own money on your own web space to do so. Any attempts to use the comments section for advertisements will be deleted, and the perpetrator barred, unless they are particularly stupid, in which case I reserve the right to pinch an idea from Teresa Nielsen Hayden and delete all the vowels.
This is not a contacts site. If you are looking for help regarding a particular path, I suggest The Witches' Voice, which does operate a contacts service.
Allowed HTML:
a href, b, br, p, strong, em, ol, ul, li, blockquote, q, pre. If your name has accents in it, things will work better if you use the XHTML entities for those letters. The same applies if you are using a word processor to compose your comment, then copying and pasting the text—either turn off curly quotes and avoid using em-dashes, or edit your comment after pasting to get rid of them. Garbled comments usually get deleted.