United States: It seems that, at some point, Jerry Falwell managed to accidentally preach a message that bore some resemblance to the recorded teachings of Jesus Christ, and that has annoyed Fred Phelps.
WBC will preach at the memorial service of the corpulent false prophet Jerry Falwell, who spent his entire life prophesying lies and false doctrines likeGod loves everyone.
Naturally, he concludes that Falwell must be in a well known Norwegian town, and gives his reasons. Two of them are worth repeating, the first being a bit of tedious theological hair-splitting which means nothing to the sensible.
Falwell bitterly and viciously attacked WBC because of WBC's faithful Bible preaching -- thereby committing the unpardonable sin -- otherwise known as the sin against the Holy Ghost.
Hang on, I thought that sin was specifically denying the Holy Spirit (which does not exist, by the way), not having boring arguments?
Falwell warmly praised Christ-rejecting Jews, pedophile-condoning Catholics, money-grubbing compromisers, practicing fags like Mel White, and backsliders like Billy Graham and Robert Schuler, etc. All for lucre -- making him guilty of their sins.
Ah yes, pooves. We knew they'd be mentioned soon enough. Of course, because Falwell was not fond of pooves (though he did, towards the end of his life, make the outrageous suggestion that they be treated like human beings), it makes him a hard target for Phelp's obsession with hot man-on-man sex, so the rest of his announcement makes no mention of Falwell whatsoever, just pooves. The announcement is on the home page, and will no doubt change as soon as Phelps thinks about pooves again, so here's a screenshot of the entire page (PNG, 540Kb).
WBC will Preach at Jerry Falwell's Funeral!!—God Hates America, 15th May 2007 (probably).
United States: More and more conspiracy theorists have been hard at work coming up with their interpretation of the Virginia Tech shootings. After all, mentally ill person goes over the edge
is far too simple to be the Truth. Salvador Astucia even manages to link it in with dead Wiccan soldiers being allowed to have a symbol of their religion on their gravestones.
There appears to be a great deal of occult activity in the Roanoke/Blacksburg area of Virginia... Have the police investigated the possibility that the slayings may have been ritualistic killings associated with satanic cults? Were any of the victims or their friends followers of Wicca, which is another term for witchcraft?...
Why did the Bush Administration endorse witchcraft within the military shortly after the slayings? Unbelievable as it sounds, the Bush Administration suddenly recognized Wicca (witchcraft) as a religion within the military less than one week after the Virginia Tech slayings... How is it possible that a conservative Republican and born-again Christian like George W. Bush would suddenly allow witchcraft to be a bona fide religion within the U.S. military? This happened just a few days after Bush spoke to students, faculty members, friends and relatives of shooting victims at Virginia Tech. If the situation weren't so tragic, it would make a funny comedy sketch on Saturday Night Live. I can just picture a Bush imitator saying,You young people have endured a great tragedy, and in times like this, we need to look to the Lord for guidance. And if that doesn't work, try witchcraft!This is unreal. Is it possible the Bush Administration's capitulation on Wiccans in the military was a quid pro quo of some sort–a payment to the true killers?
Of course, this particular hypothesis ignores the fact that there have been Wiccan (and, gasp, even Satanist) military chaplains in the US forces for about 20 years now.
Not so much a conspiracy theory, and more like hate speech aimed at an already demonised minority group, one of the American tabloids has decided that Cho did it because he was a poof. Of course, it makes complete sense! Pooves always go around stalking and harassing women to have sex with them.
