Red Wolf: December 2003 Archives

December 31, 2003

Using Intelligence Instead of Arrogance

Iraq: The US has a lot to learn in the way it allows its officers to conduct business with the citizens of Iraq. The officers arrogance has done much to antagonize the people. Fortunately, there is one beacon of light, Lt Col Alan King is a man who is not only prepared to sit and listen, but does his homework beforehand.

Saving Iraq From Islam

Iraq: First they came under US gun fire, now the locals in Baghdad are under an US-led attack of a different kind. Batten down the hatches, the fundies are about to hit town.

December 30, 2003

A Lesson in Language

Canada: Michael Neumann, a teacher of philosophy at Trent University in Canada, eloquently argues the problem of the term anti-Semitism being co-opted for political gain by both sides of the fence.

Ruffled Feathers

United States: The gathering of stern men in brightly coloured frocks and funny hats that make up the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Boston has demanded the removal of a People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals billboard showing the Virgin Mary cradling a lifeless chicken in her arms.

December 28, 2003

Orson Scott Card

United States: One my favourite writers turns out to be a bigoted hypocritic wanker.

I've wanted for a while now to write some kind of posting about what a terrible human being Orson Scott Card is... Fortunately, someone's already done a lot of the work for me; I had no idea he called himself a Democrat, despite being, well, very conservative. But there is much more to his being a terrible human being than just pro-Bush-ism. Pretty much any possible good impression you could get of the man from Ender's Game is in fact totally wrong. Also, he really hates gays.

Sometimes it's best not to meet your heroes, especially if they're going to spew mindless Mormon doctrine at you.

Orson Scott Card - HogBlog, 28th December 2003.

Thank You For Your Concern, Now Please Go Away

Those twisted religious-zealot mullahs in Iran would rather see people in Bam die in the rubble than permit any Zionist group to send trained people to help in the rescues.

Iran said on Saturday it would accept aid from all foreign countries except Israel following the quake...
...Officials in Tehran also stressed the need for sniffer dogs and aid equipment — medicines, blankets and tents — rather than foreign volunteers.

World aid effort gets under way as Iran quake toll rises - channelnewsasia.com, 27th December 2003 (via Dodgeblogium).

I Found Jesus...

...He was behind the sofa the whole time.

How can you pass up an eBay gem like this one? Think of all the fun you could have baiting the fundies in your neighbourhood. Of course, that is making the assumption that they can read.

I FOUND JESUS behind sofa button badge pin - eBay, 27th December 2003 (via Hogblog).

December 27, 2003

Dinosaurs of Eden

United States: I've always wondered how the creationists dealt with scientists constantly digging up critters that aren't mentioned in their book of fairy stories bible. It seems they power up the spin machine a write mountains of dodgy children's books to brainwash their offspring into believing a load of old cobblers.

I should note that some other Creationists are still sticking to the old explanations about how all these extinct and fossilized species were killed off during the Flood. I still haven't figured out how they reconcile this with God's commandment that Noah take all the animals with him on the Ark. Maybe they blame it on the ticket agent.

It's worth having a look at a long, thoughtful, and diverse list of things creationists hate.

Dinosaurs of Eden - Making Light, 21st December 2003.

December 24, 2003

The Ultimate Captive Audience

United States: Always on the outlook for a new captive audience, the evangelical driven InnerChange Freedom Initiative has found the ultimate pool of people to harrass by moving into the business of faith-based prisons.

December 23, 2003

Diverse Families Exhibit Attacked by Pastor

United States: Despite the protestations and threats of fire and brimstone from Steve McCracken, local Bapitist pastor and resident foaming fundie loony, Beaverton School District will press ahead with its plan to present a family diversity photo exhibit that includes images of gay parents.

December 22, 2003

Catholic Priest Distributing Pr0n

United States: A Roman Catholic diocese in western Pennsylvania has become a tad miffed with Reverend John Nesbella. They have ordered the priest to cease and desist distributing Medical Consequences of What Homosexuals Do, an anti-gay sex pamphlet, not because it is blatant fundie propaganda, but because it borders on the pornographic.

The Boss Fighting the Bigots

United States: Replacements, a Greensboro, North Carolina company specialising in discontinued dinnerware scores 100% on the Human Rights Campaign's equality index for its efforts to ensure that gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered employees can work in an environment free of hostility with equal benefits. And of course, for creating such an environment and supporting equal rights, openly-gay CEO Robert Page receives hate mail from the loony fundies who can wield a crayon through their rabid dribbling.

Is That a Dildo in your Handbag?

United States: Seems the police in Texas have nothing better to do with their time than to mount personnel intensive sting operations to entrap housewives selling sex toys whose only crime was not knowing about a legal loophole.

December 20, 2003

Jihadi Blues

Pakistan: Fanatically committed jihadis are supposed to awe the infidel with their headlong kamikaze ardor. But what if you've been around the block a couple of times, and you accidentallly survive somehow, and you become a bitter, disenchanted, cynical, grumpy jihadi?

Tacky USB Projects

In this project called Taking Menorah Design into the 59th Century, an amateur hardware hacker uses the $8 commodity USB chipset to brew his own USB-powered menorah, then writes some code to get the shamas to blink arbitrary messages in Morse code.

December 18, 2003

Not So Charming

Nigeria: Ashi Terfa, a traditional doctor in central Nigeria, has been shot dead by a patient, Umaa Akor, who was testing the potency of an anti-bullet charm the herbalist had prepared for him.

To confirm its efficacy, the herbalist tied the charm around his neck and insisted that Akor should fire a gun at him. The experiment proved fatal for the herbalist and his skull was shattered, he [police spokesman Bode Fakeye] added. He died immediately.

'Bullet-proof' man shot dead - News24, 17th December 2003.

December 16, 2003

Bow Before Me You Ungrateful Heathens

United States: Ryan Thompson is a junior loony fundie, firmly believes he has the ability to fire conservative truth from the hip. Alas, he's just another deluded bigot with a chip on his shoulder who likes to mouth off about things he cannot comprehend, such as thorny issue of foreign policy.

I Was a Tool of Satan

United States: The life of a political cartoonist is fraught with the perils of fending off attacks from thin-skinned fundies with way too much time on their hands. Doug Marlette discusses the latest influx of affronted loonies as well as battles past.

December 15, 2003

Bad Mouse, No Bottomless Lederhosen

United States: A loony fundie group calling themselves the Christian Action Network — a name that really should have its own line of action figures — is begging all and sundry for funds to help them stop the evil of Disney. Not the evil of the empire of the mouse in general with it's anything for a buck manifesto, but because it dares to pander to a those nasty homosexuals with its blatant Gay Days.

December 13, 2003

Fear of New Things Shortens Life

Canada: Animals with neophobia — fear of new things — die younger, suggesting that a lifetime of fearful stress can take an accumulated toll on health.

While the research has so far been confined to animals, it does beg the question; If fundies are innately scared of homosexuals, original thought, fundies from the opposition party or cornflakes, will they be popping their cogs sooner than people who approach life with an open mind?

Fear of new things shortens life - New Scientist, 8th December 2003 (via Opinions of the Wolf: News).

December 12, 2003

Begone Foul Proselytiser

Don't know how I missed the original story about the ram with a distaste for Jehovah's Witnesses, but a search on the topic did turn up a commentary on the story with some suggestions for turning away the hoards of Holy Johs, Mormons, and other evangelists, such as mobile phone salespeople that will be beating a path to your door this holiday season armed with the firm belief that the only way to secure their own place in heaven is to try to flog you a ticket for the journey as well.

December 11, 2003

Teacher Sues for Right to Teach

United States: Gary Cole, a seventh grade social studies teacher in Maine, has sued the School Administrative District 1 claiming it violated his First Amendment right of free expression.

It seems the moral moronity of loony fundies have managed to bully the school system into developing a history curriculum that forbids discussion of any non-Christian civilisations or any religions other than Christianity.

Conquer the Sodomites!

Australia: Join us in enjoying the enlightening spiritual updates from the St Jensen's Parish Newsletter:

December 10, 2003

Beyond Gomorrah: America's Culture

United States: Anthony LoBaido is an evangelical fundamentalist with access to a computer and a complete lack of understanding that America and culture are mutually exclusive. He has recently taken a respite from his self imposed exile from the television to enlighten the god botherers on the filth currently being peddled on the box.

A Helpful Guide for Surviving an Australian Christmas

Australia: Hark the Herald angels sing — your complete guide to the festive season Downunder.

December 9, 2003

Groundhog Day

United States: Proving that weird fundy phenomenon of seeing god in a potato, the latest object they have latched onto is a movie; Groundhog Day. The Museum of Modern Art has included it in it's The Hidden God: Film and Faith, retrospective of religious films.

Don't think that it's just one flavour of fundies who believe that the movie beautifully expresses Christian belief, apparently Groundhog Day crossed all religious boundaries. Rabbis are using it because of its illustration of the Jewish faith and the Buddhists are claiming it is quintessentially Buddhist.

Shocking Pots Claim Turner Prize

England: Grayson Perry, accepted the £20,000 Turner Prize at a dinner at Tate Britain last night dressed in a little-girl frock with his blond hair brushed up as his female alter ego, Claire.

His vases typically depict controversial topics such as sex and child abuse. Vases depicting sex scenes and child abuse are, however, quite bland for the Turner Prize. Previous winners have included a soiled bed, a pickled cow and a painting adorned with elephant dung. Last year's winner, Keith Tyson, presented lead casts of every item on a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant's menu.

Transvestite's shocking pots claim victory in Turner PrizeThe Telegraph, 8th December 2003 (via The Green Man).

December 8, 2003

God Wants You to Beat the Hell out of Your Children

United States: Louie Guerrero, who was 11 years old at the time, testified that he was severely beaten with a tree branch by a church pastor and his twin brother, Joshua and Caleb Thompson, to get the devil out of him because he had misbehaved during Bible class.

At one point, the boy said, he was told to pick up the pieces of the tree branch that broke during the beating. He said the beating resumed after one of brothers got a new stick...

Holier Than Thou Politics

United States: As the media circus that is the run up to elections in the US mobilises, the Democratic candidates are playing the holy roller card that has served the Republicans so well.

Democrats Try to Regain Ground on Moral Issues - The New York Times (registration required), 6th December 2003.

December 7, 2003

The Lord Moves in Mysterious Ways

Germany: Frithjof Schwesig, vicar in the southwestern town of Lampoldshausen, ordered 300 copies of a video film portraying the life of Christ as told by the gospel according to Luke.

Unfortunately there was a wee bit of a mix up at the Munich video copying plant when they accidentally sent through the wrong movie. At a marathon viewing session that night, the good vicar and his staff established that 200 of the videos were pornographic.

Sorry We Molested You

Ireland: Backed into a corner after being outed by a report claiming that the Catholic Church in Ireland mishandled cases of kiddy fiddling by the clergy, they have promised to do better the next time a priest gets caught with his hand in the altar boy.

A survey, commissioned by the church, showed four out of five people felt it had not dealt adequately with the problem. The research, by the psychology department of the Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland, reported that abused people and their families felt a lack of awareness by the Church of the effects of the abuse, and that the handling of complaints often lacked compassion. It made 19 recommendations for the protection of children, the handling of complaints and the training of priests.

Ireland's Catholic Church apologises for years of abuse - The Independent, 5th December 2003.

December 6, 2003

No, Jesus Is My Personal Savior

United States: Duane and Matt fight it out over just whose personal saviour the lord is:

What? Now you've opened up your soul to Him and made a home for the Lord in your heart, too? Give me a break, Matt. You're just saying that because I told you I'd been born again into new life in the love and grace of our Lord, the Redeemer, Christ Jesus. Let's get one thing clear: Jesus is my personal savior, not yours. I don't want you horning in on my eternal-salvation action.

Battle of the Fish Stickers

Egypt: The stylised fish, long a symbol of Christianity amongst Egypt's Coptic minority, has started a local war of bumper stickers in Cairo. The Copts imported their tacky fish stickers from the United States, while some of the wags in the Muslim community counteracted by selling shark stickers.

If you're after the car emblems, which are the metal car badges rather than the dodgy holographic stickers, Evolve Fish sell a wide range, including the legendary Darwin Fish.

Christian Fish, Muslims Shark Swimming Through Cairo Traffic in War of Stickers - SFGate.com, 28th November 2003.

December 5, 2003

Contraceptive Equity

United States: Religious groups are battling it out in the courts over whether health insurance plans that provide prescription drug coverage must also include coverage for prescription contraceptives.

Fighting the Myths of AIDS

South Africa: South African-based health workers and researchers are struggling to educate the public about safe sex, but it's a tough battle when they are have to combat some of the insane myths about the disease.

December 4, 2003

Go Directly to Court, Do Not Pass Church, Do Not Collect Scholarship

United States: When Joshua Davey graduated from high school in 1999, he won a Washington State scholarship to help pay for his college tuition. But when he declared he wanted to major in theology and become a minister, the state retracted its aid offer.

Not taking this affront to his choice of a future career lying down, Davey did the all American thing and sued. And with every fundie with a grievance over the separation of church and state trying to stick their nose into the case, the only real winners will be the lawyers.

A Case of Faith and College Aid - The Christian Science Monitor, 2nd December 2003.

Not Without Your Male Guardian

Saudi Arabia: Debate is raging over a popular Saudi Arabian television program.

December 2, 2003

Marilyn Manson Used to Promote Fundie Propaganda

Switzerland: No doubt looking to drum up some free press, the Swiss-based fundie group Christians for Truth, displaying a typical lack of understanding between fantasy and reality, have attacked Marilyn Manson.

...the artist [Marilyn Manson] was under investigation for allegedly breaching Swiss law protecting religion as well as making incitements to violence during a concert in the city in February 2001.

I find it more interesting that this particular group of loons, while claiming to be based in Switzerland, are in reality based in South Africa. It's also worth noting that they are happily spouting the Vatican party line on condoms causing AIDS.

Marilyn Manson Faces Swiss Criminal Probe - ABC News, 2nd December 2003.

I Will Never Use the Word Gay in School Again

United States: It's no big shock that the fundies run roughshod over education in the US, there are still a bunch of them trying to force their creationist fairy tale on schools. I'm sure it will come as no surprise that a 7 year old was punished for telling a classmate that his mother was a lesbian.

A teacher who heard the remark scolded Marcus, telling him gay was a bad word and sending him to the principal's office. The following week, Marcus had to come to school early and repeatedly write: I will never use the word 'gay' in school again.

Louisiana school punishes 7-year-old for talking about lesbian mother, ACLU alleges - SFGate.com, 1st December 2003.

December 1, 2003

Harry Potter and The Origin of Christmas

United States: There's nothing like Harry Potter to bring the fundies out of the woodwork, as Marshall Field's discovered when they selected the boy wizard as the theme for their 2000 Christmas display. I have to wonder if they are just as miffed over this year's theme of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

It's a given that these intellectual giants are ignorant of that fine Christian tradition of co-opting pagan traditions as their own to convert the heathen masses.

Get your facts straight people. The Christians hijacked the pagan celebration of the winter solstice and the Roman celebration of Saturnalia. These celebrations date back at least 4,000 years, long before the birth of Christ and are responsible for such Christmas traditions as the Christmas Tree and decorations, Mistletoe and Exchange of Gifts. The actual date that was chosen to be the notional birth of Jesus was, in fact, the day celebrated as the birthday of Mithras, the Persian sun god who was popular at the time Christmas was created by the Pope in 320AD. Rather than try to get the peasants to change celebration dates it was decided to use this date even though evidence suggests that Jesus was actually born around midsummer, i.e. June or July.

Harry Potter and The Origin of Christmas - The Green Man, 26th November 2003.

Don't Tell the Pope

El Salvador: Despite of the foolish waffle of an eccentric old cross-dresser in a silly hat, some of the Catholic Church's troops on the ground are more interested in helping people than committing murder in the name of religion.

About this Archive

This page is an archive of recent entries written by Red Wolf in December 2003.

Red Wolf: November 2003 is the previous archive.

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