Red Wolf: June 2004 Archives

June 30, 2004

Blood As An Anti-Ghost Potion

India: I suppose there's some bizarre logic involved in the belief that drinking the blood of the people you kill will stop them from haunting you. The particular wingnut is question has finally been nabbed by the local plods.

A man suspected of killing three people and then drinking their blood to ward off their spirits was arrested in north India yesterday, police said.
Hiralal Totia was arrested in Shankarpur village in Uttar Pradesh state, police told the Press Trust of India.
Police said Totia killed a police officer and then sucked his blood. He did the same with two other victims — a taxi driver and a woman, they added.
Totia told police under interrogation that he drank the blood of his victims as he believed this would keep away their spirits.

'Vampire' killings arrest [BugMeNot] - AFP, 24th June 2004.

June 27, 2004

Campaign Office in Trouble Over Orgies

Australia: Apparently I live under a rock and missed this delightful gem that the lovely Feòrag sent my way.

A jury in Brisbane has heard claims of orgies in a unit used as a National Party electoral campaign office during the lead-up to Queensland's historic 1989 state election.

This is when the Nats were ousted from their 32 year reign in power. Their dictator in chief was Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen who finally managed to get caught out and was forced to resign in 1987. So things were not looking too rosy for a National Party win in the 1989 elections when the master of election rigging was no longer at the helm.

June 23, 2004

Bargain of the Day: Creepy Jesus Antenna

Europe: There are European companies that specialise in camouflaged mobile masts and antennae, as a panacaea to those that find the things eyesores. One firm is now manufacturing an antenna disguised as a crucifix, intended to go on the steeples of churches. Get your creepy Jesus mobile antenna now!

European companies are finding ingenious ways to disguise ugly, but necessary, mobile phone antenna masts. Customers can pick everything from trees to crucifixes.

Religious Groups Unite Against Fundamentalist Extremist

Ireland: It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling when diverse religious groups unite to protest against loony fundamentalists. With the Shrub's history of isolating himself from reality, I doubt the silly bastard will know the dissent exists, but good luck to them regardless.

A group of leading Irish religious representatives came out in support of protests against the forthcoming visit of US President George Bush to Ireland.
Christian, Buddhist and Muslim representatives, together with the NGO Peace Alliance, have planned a number of peaceful protests for this weekend.
They are calling on Irish people to join their demonstrations taking place in Dublin and at Dromoland Castle, where the US President is staying.
Fr Frank Brady said: George Bush is portraying the American people as dishonest, deceitful and untrustworthy. I don't think that that is fair. I think we need to protest and raise our voices.

Religious urge protests against Bush visit - Ireland On-Line, 21st June 2004.

June 22, 2004

Pope To See Vicar Of Dibley

Vatican: Maybe it's just me, but I find the idea of the Pope getting access to The Vicar of Dibley, Absolutely Fabulous and Tipping the Velvet hilarious.

The Pope will be able to watch EastEnders and The Vicar of Dibley after the BBC signed a deal to broadcast in the Vatican.
BBC Prime will also screen the racy lesbian drama Tipping the Velvet, the makeover show What Not To Wear, Fawlty Towers and the Teletubbies.

June 21, 2004

Catholic Church Pimping For Bush

United States: With the boys in frocks taking a public political stance, it looks like it's time to strip the Catholic church of its tax exempt status. Funny how this came about a week after King George II pimped his loony fundie stance to the Pope and requested the doddering old pontiff run interference with his opposite number.

The nation's Roman Catholic bishops approved a statement on Friday on Catholics in Political Life that brands politicians who support abortion rights as cooperating in evil and leaves the door open for bishops to deny communion to such lawmakers.
The bishops, meeting outside Denver, stopped short of saying that those lawmakers should be forbidden to take communion. But they reminded all Catholics that they were not worthy to receive communion until they had examined their consciences, including their fidelity to the moral teaching of the church in personal and public life.
The bishops also asserted unequivocally that the Catholic community and Catholic institutions should not give awards, honors or platforms to Catholics who act in defiance of our fundamental moral principles.

June 20, 2004

Seeing Things In Genoa

Italy: Ah, the Italians. If they're not blaming phantom Satanic cults for murders, they're seeing things in religious icons.

Thousands of faithful and curious Italians have visited a statue of Christ after a woman said she saw the face of mystic monk Padre Pio appear on the bronze figure in the north-western city of Genoa.
The Cardinal of Genoa came to see it last night and he agreed that there was a face but said that further investigations were needed, Mauro Boccaccio, spokesman for the regional government of Liguria, said.

Statue with the face of a monk - Reuters, 20th June 2004.

Paedophile Taskforce Nets Ministers

Australia: The great unwashed are always making claims about Scoutmasters being secret kiddie fiddlers. Not in Adelaide, where the cops netted two former Anglican ministers, a former Salvation Army officer, a former junior surf lifesaving coach, two former leaders of the Church of England Boys Society and nary a Scoutmaster in sight.

Two former Anglican ministers and a former Salvation Army officer are among nine people arrested over several days for child sex offences by a South Australian police taskforce.

Those arrested also include a former junior surf lifesaving coach and two former leaders of the Church of England Boys Society.

The first of the nine arrests was made last Thursday by the South Australian Police paedophile task force as part of their investigations into child sex abuse claims within the Anglican Church in Adelaide.

June 19, 2004

Pot Calling Kettle Black

United States: The always amusing Mark Morford drags a pompous little fundie into the light and takes a look a bizarre American culture, or lack thereof.

June 18, 2004

Mormon Assassination Plot and the Ones That Didn't Get Away

United States: Murder, dismemberment, a Mormon cult, the death penalty, and Playboy model Kerissa Fare. Oh, and Rohypnol. What more could you want?

This may be the year of the celebrity trial — Michael Jackson the King of Pop on child molestation charges, the basketball star Kobe Bryant accused of rape, the legendary record producer Phil Spector indicted for murder — but the kookiest, darkest, most grimly compelling court case in America may well be one that is receiving almost no media attention at all.
This week, a jury in Martinez, a small town outside San Francisco, will retire to consider the bizarre, brutally violent cult surrounding one Glenn Taylor Helzer, a lapsed Mormon accused of bludgeoning and dismembering five people in an elaborate extortion racket intended to hasten the second coming of Jesus Christ.
Helzer, a former stockbroker who has already pleaded guilty and faces the death penalty, exerted a charismatic hold over an eclectic group of followers including his younger brother, a former girlfriend turned Playboy centrefold model, and a self-described good witch who once offered to raise money for Armageddon by appearing in porn films.

German Football Superstitions

Portugal: Whether this is a true case of triskaidekaphobia, racism or a more practical concern that the Bulgarians may have left a surprise behind that the cleaners haven't yet found is debatable, but the German football team for the Euro 2004 comp refuses to stay on the 13th floor.

Germany soccer team refused to stay on the 13th floor of a plush Lisbon hotel, fearing it will bring bad luck in the Euro 2004 competition.
The squad have asked the management of the five-star Corinthia Alfa hotel to allocate them different floors to the Bulgarian team, which had just checked out of the hotel.
The German team are due to come to our hotel next week and they want two floors.
We already had the Bulgarian team on the 13th and 14th floors but the Germans say it brings bad luck, said Isabel Santos, the rooms division manager.
We will change, it's not a problem. We have 24 floors so they can have any floor they want, she told Reuters.
Germany play Czech Republic in their final Group D game next Wednesday in Lisbon.

Team Won't Stay on Hotel's 13th Floor - Reuters, 17th June 2004.

June 17, 2004

President Bush's Links To Wacky Cults

United States: Fun Neal Pollack article in The Stranger about President Bush's kooky religious beliefs.

This is also the kind of country where the president meets with the members of a radical, far-right millennialist Christian sect three weeks before he counteracts all known international law and opinion regarding the Israeli-Palestinian situation. That sect, known as the Apostolic Congress, opposes any deal with the Palestinians because it believes that Christ won't return to Earth until all of Israel belongs to the Jews and Solomon's temple is rebuilt.

Church & State - The Stranger, 10th June 2004 (via BoingBoing).

Mad Monk's Willy Lives On

Russia: Rasputin's family jewels, lovingly preserved in a pickle jar, are about to go on display in a Russian museum of erotica.

In a more innocent age, it was said that Gregory Efimovich Rasputin's legendary power over women was due to his piercing eyes.
But a new museum of erotica here suggests that the mad monk's charm may instead have been, ahem, concealed beneath his cassock.
Measuring 28.5cm (about 11 inches) — allowing for shrinkage caused by pickling — Rasputin's penis displayed in a tall glass bottle is, to put it delicately, a big attraction at the museum.

June 16, 2004

Swiss Put A VooDoo Whammy On Beckham

Switzerland: You've got to love a country with a wacky sense of humour.

Swiss fans have taken to voodoo to pin down England ahead of their Euro 2004 match Thursday.
Join in — give the English pains in their legs on June 17 against Switzerland, said the newspaper campaign which shows an effigy of England captain David Beckham with nails, screws and tacks stuck in his legs.
This might help: Rip out this page, stick it to the wall, give it a good going-over with nails, needles and the stapler. And believe in it, said the advertisement, a tongue-in-cheek campaign to promote Swiss advertising agencies.
England captain Beckham broke a bone in his foot in 2002 just before the World Cup although he played in the tournament.

Swiss Soccer Fans Pin Down England with Voodoo Campaign - Reuters, 15th June 2004.

June 15, 2004

Churches as Paid Mouthpieces for BushCo

United States: King George II has been recruiting churches to spread the Bush lies, a blatant breach of law and a damn fine reason to strip any church involved of their tax-exempt status.

The byplay was as inevitable as chickens being provided to the barrios of Mexico just before the eleccion. President Bush first opens the spigot of public money to churches and other faith-based groups to the tune of over a billion dollars last year, then he knocks on the faith community's door for a political favor, por favor.

The Bush-Cheney re-election campaign is not a bit embarrassed at being caught trying to organize a brigade of (mostly) Christian soldiers in houses of worship throughout Pennsylvania who would act as point people for the campaign. After reports emerged that the Bush campaign's national headquarters asked the Pennsylvania contingent to identify 1,600 'Friendly Congregations' in Pennsylvania where voters friendly to President Bush might gather on a regular basis, Steve Schmidt, a spokesman for the Bush administration, told the New York Times: People of faith have as much right to participate in the political process as any other community.

Catholic Church Outsourcing Prayers To India

United States: As if it wasn't bad enough that IT workers were losing their jobs to overseas outsourcers, now the Catholics are outsourcing prayers to Indian priests.

With Roman Catholic clergy in short supply in the United States, Indian priests are picking up some of their work, saying Mass for special intentions, in a sacred if unusual version of outsourcing.

American, as well as Canadian and European churches, are sending Mass intentions, or requests for services like those to remember deceased relatives and thanksgiving prayers, to clergy in India.

About 2 percent of India's more than one billion people are Christians, most of them Catholics.

June 14, 2004

Priest Publishes Memoirs of his Sex Romps

Argentina: Father Mariani has gotten the grand poohbahs in frocks off-side with by publishing his memoirs of sex romps as a priest. The church may be miffed, but the book has almost sold out, proving the old maxim that sex sells.

A 77-year-old Roman Catholic priest in Argentina has published his memoirs recounting sex with women and a frustrated gay liaison, angering Church officials.

The autobiography No Beating About The Bush. The Life of a Priest, tells of the life and loves of Father Jose Mariani in a posh parish in Cordoba, Argentina's third biggest city where he has been a priest for 53 years.

I could hear my heart beat in ecstasy before the beauty of the body offered before me. I smothered the body with the sweat of my skin, Mariani wrote in the book about having sex with a woman.

June 13, 2004

Loony Fundie Plays Politics With Teenagers Lives

Australia: What sort of moron puts a loony fundie in charge of health decisions? Little Johnny Coward, of course. The repressed and moronic Tony Abbott, a staunch Catholic and firm believer in keeping women of all ages barefoot and pregnant, has stuck his fool neck out and demanded that the morning after pill be yanked from pharmacies and that teenagers health records no longer be subject to doctor-patient confidentiality.

Federal Health Minister Tony Abbott wants to make the controversial morning-after pill a prescription-only drug, only six months after it was made available over the pharmacy counter.
Citing concern about media reports of 13-year-old girls requesting the emergency contraception, Mr Abbott said the obvious thing is simply to restore the situation that existed before the de-scheduling by the National Drugs and Poisons Schedule Committee.

Apparently Mr Abbott is quite happy for 13-year-old girls to be having babies. The bloody law was changed so kids like this could gain access to a drug that could help them instead of forcing them to hide a pregnancy then smother the baby behind the bike sheds. Gee, which is the preferable option.

June 12, 2004

Gibson Takes a Swipe at Packer

Australia: Gibson is suing the company that distributed his snuff flick on the grounds that they gipped him out of his cut of the profits. Money certainly does speak louder than the tenets of the bloke he claims to venerate.

Jesus may have chased the money men out of the temple, but Mel Gibson claims they left without paying him a fortune in box office receipts.

Icon Distribution, Gibson's film company, is suing Regal Entertainment Group, the largest cinema company in the world, for $US40 million ($57.2 million) and as much as $US20 million in damages for allegedly reneging on a distribution contract for Gibson's film, The Passion of The Christ.

Icon claims that Regal, of which James Packer is a director, did not pay up its fair share of ticket revenue for the film, which beat all expectations when it opened to huge controversy in February.

June 11, 2004

Australian Churches Want Charlatan Tested

Australia: Professional charlatan Benny Hinn is about to tour Australia to part the gullible from their money. Local church leaders want the silly bastard to submit proof of his alleged miracles.

A modern Christian crusade led by American television evangelist Benny Hinn, a self-professed miracle-worker and faith healer, will be unleashed on Brisbane later this month.

More than 30,000 believers hoping for some kind of healing of body, mind or spirit, are expected to raise the roof of the Brisbane Entertainment Centre for two shows — sandwiched between shows in Chicago and Ohio — on June 25 and 26. They are his only shows in Australia.

Apart from those watching television during the vampire hours, relatively few Australians know of Hinn although his Orlando Christian Centre ministry, founded two decades ago, earns up to $100 million a year and is said to have a weekly world TV audience of more than 50 million.

In the US disbelievers have marred his church and concert hall performances by protesting outside venues and accusing the 51-year-old Lebanese-born tele-minister of preying on the sick and elderly.

Watchdog groups have been lobbying US Congress to pass legislation making it illegal to hawk anything that cannot be proven to deliver what it promises, and authorities have also been investigating his growing wealth.

Lazy Cops Blame Satan

Italy: The lovely Feòrag passed this on to me before she departed for her tour of the continent. Well, bits of it. All right, the fine purveyors of beer in Berlin.

It seems that the plods in Milan are either incredibly lazy, superstitious or both. When confronted with the bodies of two teenagers, rather than investigate, they jumped to the astounding conclusion that, as they were both members of a metal band, their deaths were the work of Satanists.

A gruesome find in a wood outside Milan has sparked fears that bored young Italians could be coming under the influence of Satanic cults.
The news has caused an outbreak of soul-searching in Catholic Italy.
Even hardened police officers were shocked by what they found outside the sleepy commuter town of Busto Arsizio.
Two teenagers' bodies were discovered in a makeshift grave, killed — police say — as part of a satanic ritual involving sex, drugs and rock and roll.

Hmm... sex, drugs and rock and roll, in my part of the world we call that a party.

June 8, 2004

Religious Loonies Attack Playschool

Australia: A minority group of whingeing fundamentalists that go by the innocuous sounding name of the Australian Family Association — much like those notoriously rampant bigots from Focus on the Family — have set their letter writing monkeys to work complaining about the evil of Play School corrupting toddlers by forcing them to watch a segment featuring a child with two mothers. They even got their henchman from parliament, Larry Anthony, a known homophobic bigot, to play along.

June 2, 2004

Waiter, There's A Crustacean In My Water

United States: A sect of loony fundies in New York, obviously of the belief that there's nothing more important to worry about in the world, have their knickers in a twist over crusteceans in their drinking water.

Orthodox Jews in New York have become concerned that the city's drinking water may not be kosher because it contains tiny crustaceans known as copepods.
The organisms, which measure about a millimeter long, pose no threat to human health, according to the city Department of Environmental Protection. But Orthodox teaching bars the eating of crustaceans — aquatic animals with skeletons outside their bodies, including shrimp, crab and lobsters.
The organisms first came to the attention of Jewish leaders in Brooklyn two weeks ago, The New York Times reported Tuesday. An Israeli produce company that exports kosher vegetables to New York alleged that its products had become infested with insects after being washed in the city's water.

If you're a company involved in water filters or bottled water it looks like scaring the insane is a great way to boost business.

Orthodox Jews Worry Water Isn't Kosher - AP, 1st June 2004.

June 1, 2004

Pope Pimps Gibson's Vanity Pic Again

Vatican: As if pimping the film first time around wasn't bad enough, the boys in the frocks and silly hats have set the wheels in motion to offer up a sainthood to the mad old broad who wrote the book that inspired Gibson to inflict his drivel on the world.

The 19th century German nun whose blood-soaked visions of Jesus's death inspired Mel Gibson's film The Passion of The Christ will soon be put on the path to sainthood, Catholic Church officials have said.
Anne Catherine Emmerich, a sickly mystic who lived from 1774 to 1824, has already reached near cult status among traditionalist Roman Catholics for the book that gave Gibson the grisly details the Gospels did not provide.

Anglican Archbishop Won't Resign

Australia: The Anglican Church in Adelaide has had the wind put up its skirts after an independent inquiry into its habit of not only turning a blind eye to kiddie fondling priests, but actively protecting them from prosecution, was released. The head sherrang has made a weak apology, but refuses to resign.

An independent inquiry into the Anglican church's handling of child sex abuse allegations in South Australia has found the church was uncaring towards victims.

The inquiry was conducted by retired Supreme Court justice Trevor Olsson and social work lecturer Donna Chung, after claims that a former youth worker abused up to 200 boys.

About this Archive

This page is an archive of recent entries written by Red Wolf in June 2004.

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