Red Wolf: July 2004 Archives

July 24, 2004

Scaring the Door Knockers

United States: I love a good frighten the fundies away tale and this is one of the more amusing.

I'm sitting on the steps leading up to (and down from, coincidentally) my apartment, smoking. It's five-thirty in the morning. Two Mormon boys appear at the bottom of the stairs.

Mormon boy 1: "Well, don't you look cheerful."

Yours Truly: "I'm contemplating genocide."

Another Letter to the Editor

The Prattle satellite office has received a missive from the seller behind a recent Bargain of the Day. Unlike his attempt at communication with the lovely Feòrag, he was forced to use the commenting form on my site, which does seem to prove that he is capable of using comment forms. It just appears that he doesn't want to directly respond to posts.

July 23, 2004

Ghosts in the Window Tinting

United States: Normally when window tinting starts to lift on a building, the installation company is called out to fix the problem, not in Texas. Crowds of the gullible and curious are flocking to a hardware store in Rio Grande Valley, Texas, to see an image of Jesus that has appeared on a tinted window at the business.

The image first appeared on a True Value store window on July 19 and caused employees to wonder where it came from.

July 20, 2004

Bigots Invading the Book Stores

United States: Nicholas Kristof wonders what it says about America when racist propaganda is on the best-seller lists.

If the latest in the Left Behind series of evangelical thrillers is to be believed, Jesus will return to Earth, gather non-Christians to his left and toss them into everlasting fire:
Jesus merely raised one hand a few inches and a yawning chasm opened in the earth, stretching far and wide enough to swallow all of them. They tumbled in, howling and screeching, but their wailing was soon quashed and all was silent when the earth closed itself again.

His and Hers Church

United Kingdom: The Catholics have to deal with the problems of have an insane misogynist taking dictation from his invisible friend, whereas the Anglicans get the joys of death by committee.

Proposals to divide the Church of England into two — one part with female clergy and one without — are being discussed by Church leaders to avert an exodus of traditionalists when women become bishops.
The Archbishop of York, Dr David Hope, has told friends he believes such a scheme, though highly controversial, is probably the only way to hold the Church together if it decides to consecrate women.
He has privately won support from the Archbishop of Canterbury, Dr Rowan Williams, who agrees the options facing the Church are limited.
Both are worried that more than 300 traditionalist clergy could quit in protest, potentially costing tens of millions of pounds in hardship payments to those who leave.

July 14, 2004

I'm Not Drunk, Officer, I'm A Priest

Croatia: Croatian priests are seeking exemption from a tough new drink driving bill on the grounds that drinking wine is part of their job description.

In an effort to improve road safety the government is planning to scrap the 0.05% limit for blood-alcohol content.
The proposed zero-tolerance approach has alarmed some clergy in the heavily Roman Catholic country, according to Jutarnji List newspaper.
Many travel between parishes to say Mass, which includes ritual drinking.

July 13, 2004

Hijacker With An Invisible Friend

Australia: A complete and utter wombat who attempted to hijack a plane is claiming that his invisible friend made him do it. Not unlike the Shrub's excuse for going to war really.

The man accused of trying to hijack a Melbourne-to-Launceston Qantas flight last year believed that God had called on him to crash the plane, a Victorian court has heard.
David Mark Robinson, 41, is alleged to have planned to kill the 50 passengers and six crew aboard the flight before crashing it into the Walls of Jerusalem national park in northern Tasmania.

Just to point out for the geographically challenged, Walls of Jerusalem is a national park in Tasmania, that little triangle shaped island under Australia, and not an architectural feature in Israel. Although I guess you could argue it was an anti-semitic attack by a man with the directional sense of child's spinning top.

July 6, 2004

Would You Care For Steak With Your Kidney?

Australia: A group of religious nuts in Australia have managed to run afoul of the authorities in their zeal to donate their kidneys.

The leader of an internet cult today said some members have lied to health authorities so that they could donate their kidneys to Australians in need of a transplant.

In Australia, kidney donations are not allowed for anyone apart from family members, friends or those with an emotional connection, to prevent organs being sold on the black market.

July 3, 2004

Serial Complainant Gets Comeuppance

Australia: Mr Fricke isn't a fan of physical contact. Especially when other men are involved. So he's made something of a career for himself as a serial sexual harassment whinger.

Talk about being a devil for punishment. Sydneysider Randolph Fricke has such a phobia about physical contact with other men that he's made five official sexual harassment complaints, including an unsuccessful one against a lawyer whom he claimed molested him by placing a hand near his groin during a mediation conference on a previous harassment complaint.
Fricke wants people to behave in a way that's conducive to the Christian Judaic ethic, which is all that has ever concerned me in my entire existence.

Christian Judaic ethic this would be as opposed to the obsessive religious nutjob ethic?

About this Archive

This page is an archive of recent entries written by Red Wolf in July 2004.

Red Wolf: June 2004 is the previous archive.

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